These are some of the folks we would like to come and shoot with us

Olga would be very welcome, Manny says he has a spare gun that might fit her, and he would be willing to give her a lift to the ground. She'd have to share the cost of diesel though, cos Manny is a farmer.

Nicole would also be very welcome. Doesn't look as though she eats much, so we'd not have to buy any extra pies for her. That said, Dave is furious that she has not responded to any of his emails over the last ten years, so his attitude is that if she does ever come out with us she can button for us, but she's jolly well not going to shoot. Simon says he can lend her a vest, so she doesn't catch cold.

Scouse is very keen to get Stevie out on a shoot with us. He says it's because he has been a fan of Stevie since, as a child, he was made to have piano lessons with Miss  Shakeshaft. The rest of us dont think the invite has much to do with Stevie's Music.

Steven Ferris! Who wouldn't want to shoot a round with one of the all time greats. Back row for Ulster, Ireland and the British Lions. One of the finest blindside flankers in the history of the game, despite a career cut short by injury. Gone from the Rugby field, but never forgotten. There'd be plenty to talk about between stands, victories over every Pro12 team and (though I've not not checked it) victories over every 6N team too. Loads of stories about getting the better of England and Wales I'm sure, .. anyone got his mobile number?

Anne Hathaway, another one who won't return Dave's calls. Simon said he wasted an hour of his life watching Les Misérables in case she got her kit off. She didn't, he says, but she would be sooooo welcome to come fire off a few cartridges with us with or without kit. Two photos. cos one simply isn't enough,

© Elm Farm Boys 2020 Shooting For Fun

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